Friday, August 18, 2006

The Battle Against TMI

In Wal-Mart a woman with young children is wearing a shirt so low and wide cut that I can see almost her whole breast, a woman at H.E.B. (our local grocery store) who has such a short pair of shorts on they really should be considered underwear, a man at the mall with words on his shirt that you still cannot say on TV, an older man sitting at a bench in a furniture store (had to be in his 50's) with a drawings that were very sexually graphic. All things that to me, fall under the title of TMI!

I feel like I spend hours a day fighting this. You know the one I am talking about: the nasty wording on bumper stickers and shirts, the overly sexually explicit shirts male and female alike feel a need to wear to stores filled with children, the crude tattoos (I realize not all tattoos are crude, but the ones of sexual nature, are offensive and if you want them fine....but why do you make me deal with it?) and half dressed women at every turn! I would love to know what person thinks I really want to know this much about them as I am grocery shopping or buying a child a pair of shoes? You can't call me a prude, however anyone who knows me, knows better. I fully understand the rest of the world does not have to have the same standards and convictions as me, but do they not even respect themselves, let alone others enough to leave some things to the imagination? You can't say it's okay, we all know it isn't, such things are done to get attention, however, how desperate are you when you feel a need to display it all to complete strangers who really could care less? is it entertaining? is it sexy?

Not to most of us.......entertainment I can pick and choose simply by using a remote, or not buying a movie/ concert ticket etc, and sexy is not half dressed sashaying around in clothes that make us answer questions about anatomy to our children who at 4 they should not have to know! Sexy is an attitude that says I am of value and worth and I know it. I am more than a sexual object, I am a person, to get me and keep me will take a LOT of work on your part. My father always told me when I was younger that the sexiest thing a woman has is her brain. It can make a plain girl amazing and a beautiful one a true catch! besides which everything else hits the floor at 40 anyways 9check the laws of gravity, it really is the truth)

I realize we live in a society of free speech and expression, but that is not carte blanche to do and say anything anywhere. When the exercising of your rights infringes on everyone else's and the bounds of common decency, then you have overstepped your bounds. It seems to me, that often this over exposure is a desperate cry for a feeling of signifigance from someone, anyone; because anything is better than just being one of the masses.

The TMI issue, to me, is a troubling symptom of a much deeper ailment. I shudder at the thought of loosing all moral bounds. You say, 'we cannot legislate morality,' yet we do it every day. Our culture and civilization recognizes certain things are wrong no matter what the reason people ahve for acting as they do. A prime example is that some cultures see murder as acceptable after a person has comitted a crime against someone in your family yet, here in this nation we have determined it not something that measures up to our moral and cultural standard so we legislate that it is wrong. I realize we cannot legislate how people dress or tattoo themselves but I DID decide to put together some guidelins (tongue in cheek of course!) that could help redirect those who may be unsure on some things

1. Please invest in a full length mirror and USE it before going into public. This assures us that at least you actually know how you look and allows us freedom to not feel guilty over the impression we have been left with.

2. Ladies be assured that if you do not have to move or mauever anything but just push less than an inch of fabric aside should you have to breastfeed your shirt/ blouse may be showing a bit too much!

3. Now I know it is hard to find anything but low slung pants right now but seeing the fruit of the loom briefs and every stretch mark you have earned through life rippling around like bread dough over your pants is not something we all want to see. I promise you, should I have the desire to see that I'll just lift my shirt and look at my own. Buy a longer shirt

4. Fellas if the holes in your jeans can answer the question "boxers or briefs" then leave them in the's not a pretty thing.

5. If your bumper sticker, t-shirt or tattoo says or depicts something you would not want to repeat in front of a respectable religious leader a 90 yr old grandmother or popping out of a sweet 4 yr old's mouth then I assure you I don't want my kids to have to read it either. There is a time and place for everything and in front of an elementary school or in the shoe department at Wal-Mart is NOT it. save it for adult only places!

6. Ladies the juniors department are for just that JUNIORS even if you are older and thin, chances are those clothes were still NOT made for you. I realize that even I can fit in them, but really it borders on a fashion crime to see a 35 yr old mother of 3 wearing such things!

7. Juniors be aware that when you lay it all out for everyone to see, someone will want to do much more than just see. Be careful the impression you leave of yourself, it may well come back to haunt you. The beauty of a young body is a precious gift, you would not leave a diamond laying about just anywhere, do not leave the images of your body there either.

8. When speaking in public places, like the checkout line or the movie theater, ask yourself ; Would even the Maury Povich Show have to *beep* your words? Chances are everyone else around you doesn't want to hear them then. It is a small thing but it really matters especially to that mother standing right behind you in line.

This concludes my list, and I hope you have had a laugh at my expense or with me either way on a much more serious note, at some point people, we really do have to ask ourselves; Why do we so carelessly allow ourselves to be displayed in such an unflattering way? Why do we allow the complete disregard of decency and respect for ourselves and others? I truly believe because we no longer see ourselves and others to be as precious and wonderful to our Maker as we are. I am of the conviction that if we did, we would see it more in our society.

Blessings to all this week!


Gina said...

LOL..loved the list and I totally understand your frustration.

Michelle Hill said...

LOL..I sure know your frustration..

Sarah Joy said...

Don't forget the midriff-baring shirt ON A PREGNANT WOMAN! Talk about TMI!!! I respect your decision to be proud of and enjoy your pregnant body, but where is the respect for all those who find it offensive to have to look at? As a largish preggie myself, it is even more offensive than when a total stranger comes up and rubbs my tummy like I'm a lucky charm.

Starr said...

WELL said Colleen! If the Lord doesn't return soon, I believe it's only going to get worse though. That doesn't mean I'm going to quit harping about it though, either!

Anonymous said...

It's all a matter of where you at & if you're at "look at me!" or if you're at "I'm desperate" or even if you're at "I'm insecure because my father beat me or didn't pay any attention to me!" then that's where you're at. It isn't a matter of what you wear but how you wear it that tells the picture of who you really are. It helps men because we're nonverbal but all visual.

Anonymous said...

I'm wondering how what your children see is my problem? How about parenting your own offspring instead of expecting the village to conform to your standards?

Becky Wolfe said...

I love it & I agree whole heartedly. I have no kids to protect their eyes & ears but I see it all around me & oh yes, I do agree!

You have an excellent writing style!